Auburn football: Only to-do list Tigers’ fans need to survive until kickoff

If you’re a college football fan you are probably excited for kickoff, but if you’re an Auburn football fan you might be struggling with impatience, anxiety and fear. To help calm those nerves and prepare you for the months ahead I have created a to-do list to help all of you survive this last month before football season begins.

This list covers everything you need to be prepared for the 2018 season — remember, the Week 1 kickoff is Sept. 1 in Atlanta against Washington.

Auburn fan to-do list

Love Auburn

Ask your physician if your heart is healthy enough for Auburn football.

Make sure all cable bills are paid.

Impulse buy new Auburn gear (like some tiger-striped tight pants or a shirt that says “AUBURN VS ALL Y’ALL”).

Check to make sure your grill is working.

Hang up and proudly display every piece of Auburn art that you own.

Purchase game tickets.

Hate Alabama.

Reapply your Auburn car magnets.

Hang Auburn flag above your porch (if you live in an apartment hang it above your living room couch as this will prove to reverse second half curses).

Call a psychologist to see if your mental state is healthy enough for Auburn football.

Call your buddy and reminisce about Auburn (mention Sky Bar or Supper Club at least twice).

Do No. 2 on this list again.

Re-watch your favorite Auburn games (cry when watching The Prayer in Jordan Hare and The Kick Six).

Stock your medicine cabinet with blood pressure and anti nausea medication.

Go to the gym and cringe at a guy’s Georgia T-shirt.

Purchase your dog/cat an Auburn outfit.

Struggle dressing your dog/cat in said Auburn outfit.

Take pictures of your dog/cat in Auburn outfit and post online.

Hate Alabama.

Read up on Auburn insider info online.

Buy a blood pressure cuff.

Clean up your cooler.

Listen to Paul Finebaum.

Experience traumatic flashback to the second half of the LSU game last year.

Think about last year’s Iron Bowl to offset trauma from No. 27.

Hate Alabama.

Update your Auburn Athletics app.

Purchase new Auburn welcome mat so people understand your home’s code of honor during football season.

If you have asthma, locate your rescue inhaler.

Over-analyze each of Auburn’s opponents.

Yell “WAR EAGLE!” at a stranger in line at Publix.

Set the fight song as your alarm clock.

Ladies, get your see-through purses ready for gameday.

Practice your anger management coping skills.

Locate your superstitious Auburn object and make sure it is easy to find at kickoff.

Buy more Auburn swag for your work desk.

Craft the perfect tailgating playlist.

Pray about it.

Get excited about Auburn football.

Believe in Auburn and love it.